The Big Three are inching ever closer to a deal with Capital Hill today. Apparently, starring in the worst sequel of the year: The Money Pit II – This Time It’s Personal last Friday played better at the box office than it did with the critics. But, then again, that usually happens with blockbuster sequels.
There were some other Tinseltown tent-pole similarities too, the story was slightly more complicated, the audience was slightly more jaded, and the budget was hugely increased. Or at least, that’s how the stars wanted it. Sure, Disney will pay Johnny Depp anything for another Pirates installment, but if Blair Witch 2 taught us anything (and it didn’t), it’s that while it may take money to make money, that’s not all it takes.
And so the bailout went from $25 billion to $34 billion to $15 billion. Oh, and that $15 billion? You can go ahead and take that out of the $25 billion we already gave to you develop that magical “fuel efficiency” thing the Japanese cracked 15 years ago. So, really, all this negotiating, debating, and public scathing, has led to… nothing. No new money to save 2 million jobs, but we will help you keep polluting and funding “petrol dictatorships”.
Bush has that special kind of senioritis, where you not just not doing your homework anymore, but you’re also setting parts of the school on fire. Because, really, who cares? You’re outta there in a few weeks and that’s when the real drinking can begin!
I found myself whole-heartedly in the “No Bailout” camp until Friday, when the job loss numbers for November were adjusted to 533,000. Yup. That’s the highest rate of job loss in a single month since December 1974. Remember the famous “malaise” Carter talked about? That happened after 1974. Things are going to get worse before they get better, but they don’t have to get “2 million newly unemployed people worse” all at once.
And that’s why I’m now begrudgingly, barley, bitterly in favor of rescuing the American auto industry. Because as much as I hate the CEOs who get multi-million dollar bonuses for running their companies into the ground, as much as I blame consumers for their obsession with SUVs, and as much as I would like to punish somebody, anybody, for socializing loss and privatizing profit… The same survey that told us 533,000 people lost their jobs last month also told us that companies have no plans to hire in the near future.
Folks, that’s how a recession becomes a depression.
So, why then, really, are so many politicians against it? It’s a fraction of the money offered the financial industry and the public was against that too. Is it because the financial industry is considered “white collar” and the auto industry is “blue collar”? Is it just birth order (if the car makers had asked first and the banks second, would they have been bailed out)? Or might Sen. Shelby of Alabama (home to Toyota and Honda plants), Sen. Corker of Tennessee (home of Nissan’s North American headquarters), and Sen. Graham of South Carolina (home to a BMW plant) have competing interests?
Remember the scene in Goodfellas where the restaurant owner comes to Pauly to ask him to invest in his business to help him through a rough patch? Pauly hems and haws (“What do I know about the restaurant business?”), but does it. Remember what happens to the restaurant? The mob guys stop paying their tabs. The business orders supplies, but when they are delivered to the front door, the mob guys just take it out back to the waiting trucks and declare the goods “stolen.” Finally, Pauly leverages every cent the restaurant has, racking up a huge debt that can never be paid off. And then, as Ray Liota tells us was the plan all along, when there is nothing more to be taken from the business, the mob burns it to the ground and collects the insurance money.
And that’s what the Bushies and their “disaster capitalism” conservative cronies are all about – squeezing everything they can out of everything they touch (Iraq, financial bailout, Katrina) and then walking away with money in their pockets and smoldering ruins in their wake.
Trouble is, as much as I don’t want to bail out the guys who burned down the restaurant, I do want those waiters and kitchen workers to be able to feed their families. Plus, gotta admit, they made a hell of a good vodka sauce.
