Although Veteran’s Day was several weeks, ago, a recent column by Bob Herbert has me thinking that this Thanksgiving is a good time for everyone to think of our veterans.
Herbert writes in his column “Help is On the Way”
If you’re in your late teens or early 20s and your energies have been directed for a year or more toward dodging roadside bombs and ambushes, caring for horribly wounded comrades and, in general, killing before being killed, it can be difficult to readjust to a world of shopping malls, speed limits and polite conversation.
My father went to Vietnam (Will’s father did too). He was deployed about a month after I was born and stayed for a year. We never talk about it, though he once said, in passing, that he was sad that he didn’t get home in time for my mother’s birthday. I do know a few things things: when he returned I had no idea who he was, cried when he picked me up and struggled to get away from him, he had nightmares for a long time, and he returned with asthma that plagues him to this day.
And he was one of the lucky ones. Unlike today’s soldiers, he only served one tour of duty. And he only returned with asthma and nightmares. Others returned with different burdens, and soldiers serving in Iraq today are returning with more physical and emotional scars that make returning to “normal” life increasingly difficult.
Enter Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America (IAVA). The group, founded in 2004, offers support in multiple areas: employment, mental health, and legal issues. And it recognizes that in the twenty first century, women soldiers have different needs and concerns that are often swept under the carpet.
Recently, the group has enjoyed media coverage for a powerful PSA. Shot in the empty streets of New York, it depicts the isolation faced by troops returning to a country distracted by too many other issues to pay sustained attention to the struggles of veterans:
As with any non-profit organization, the IAVA runs on goodwill and donations. So donate. Skip a latte or a manicure and help out a group of people so many of us claim to care about but don’t always support. Even if you’re a lefty, peacenik, give a little bit. Our government is not doing its part to care for our veterans. Until it does, support the IAVA.
Jane Austen is looking down on me and wishing she could write a book about my adventures as a wedding guest. I can almost see her, fingers itching to pick up pen and put it to parchment. And knowing Jane as I do, she’s annoyed she didn’t get to teach me a narrative lesson and pair me with some insufferable know-it-all who could keep me out of trouble. This would be the proper, narrative ending to my visit into wedding land. And it would make so many people so happy.
See here’s the thing. I have been to six weddings in the last fourteen months. I’ll leave it to you to calculate how many glasses of wine and cheese-based appetizers that adds up to.
I hadn’t been invited to a single wedding in six or seven years and then BOOM: weddings here, there, and everywhere, though, to be totally honest, half of the weddings I attended this past year have been as an FoW.* I’ve been to traditional church weddings, intimate at-home events, vineyards, capes, ranches, and castles. And I’ve seen more kinds of dancing than I can name. I might have danced with a United States Senator to “Brick House” and I discovered the true physics of high heels. No matter how comfortable the shoes, you will be forced to stand in them until your feet go numb.
After so many weddings, it’s impossible not to feel reflective. So as I waited for the bride in wedding number six to walk down the aisle, I thought back over the other five weddings I’ve witnessed. One of the many things I realized, besides the fact that bridesmaids’ dresses have come a long way since the wedding that found me in a taffeta monstrosity designed for flat-chested women and in a color that does not exist in nature, is that that my focus during the ceremonies is not so much on the brides but the grooms.
I am fascinated by them.
It’s not that the brides aren’t interesting. It is wonderful to see brides who are strong, intelligent and independent as opposed to mealy-mouthed wallflowers who look more desperate than happy on the big day. But it’s the grooms who captured my attention during this wedding marathon. It had been so long since I’d been to a wedding, that I hadn’t truly understood that there is a new model of groom in the wedding world. They are a different species than the hapless creatures I saw growing up. Regardless of race, class, or educational background, the grooms I talked to were active participants in the planning of their weddings, rattling off colors, caterers, and wedding details as quickly as their brides. I listened to two men discuss the best attire for their groomsmen.
I felt like Alice through the looking glass.
And just as I was getting used to that, a groom casually informed me that his wedding was as much, if not more, his idea than the bride’s fantasy. After attending more than 30 weddings, he knew the kind of wedding he wanted. And so while his bride, a woman whose regal bearing walking down the aisle worked wonders on my very cynical heart, would have been happy with a city-hall affair, he had dreams of vineyards.
Imagine, a man who dreamed about his wedding!
Even still, this is not why the grooms captivated me. First I thought I was fascinated by grooms because I’ve bought into the myth that men don’t want to “commit” so seeing those willing to do so in the biggest way possible is like seeing unicorns. Then I thought I was just taking advantage of the opportunity to stare unabashedly at well-dressed, handsome men, but what became clear during wedding number four is that I am fixed on the grooms because it’s rare to see men as open and tender as they are on their wedding day.
As a woman with more male friends than is probably healthy, I see men in many moods, and I see their faces as they look at the women and men they are attracted to or care about. But it’s rare to see a man look the way he does on his wedding day—slightly weepy and awestruck at once. I’ve decided that men never look more like tentative little boys then they do in the few minutes it takes their brides to reach them. The moment vanishes, and if you’re busy watching the bride, it’s easy to miss—once she’s there, he exhales, and he looks like a man again, more joyous than the average bloke but certainly less timid. They change in an instant.
The shy groom who would rather wear a skirt (you say kilt I say skirt) in public than speak to even a small group of friends and family endeared himself to me forever when, after repeating his vows, exhaled, “Whew, I did it!” We all applauded. And I look forward to toasting the golden anniversary of the groom who walked down the aisle with his new bride to the Beatles’ “When I’m Sixty-Four.”
It makes me wonder what kind of men Jane would write for her heroines were she alive today. By the time she wrote Persuasion, she had developed a man I feel is worthy of a feminist’s daydreams, but you have to suffer through a lot of insufferable men to get to Captain Wentworth (I read Austen chronologically :blush:). Would she let go of arrogant Darcy and smug Knightley and replace them with Marks, Scotts, Jasons, and Lawrences? I like to think she would. I think she’d like these grooms. She’d certainly poke sly fun of them, but it would be with an affection that mirrors my own, I’m sure. And if she plotted a story that put me with some version of one of them, I wouldn’t balk…not one bit.
Turns out his heart is even bigger than his head, and he really gets it right:
If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not… understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don’t want to deny you yours. They don’t want to take anything away from you. They want what you want — a chance to be a little less alone in the world.
The Obama Transition Team announced today that there will be no cabinet appointments this week. Good. Now we have a whole other week to speculate and scrutinize!
Secretary of State is pretty much the coolest job in the world other than “President of the United States,” “Video Game Tester,” and “Victoria Secret Photographer’s Assistant.” Bill Clinton has held three of the top four. That’s just how cool he is.
Maybe it’s time Bill got the fourth gig too…
Yup, my pick for Obama’s Secretary of State is former President Bill Clinton.
A great Secretary of State must have three qualities: 1) Complete fluencey in world affairs and leaders, 2) A love of travel, and 3) An affable personality with the people and the press. Rice might know a lot and be the most traveled StateSec in history, but no body likes her. Colin Powell knew plenty and everyone liked him, but he never hit the road. Madeline Albright had all three qualities in spades and do you remember who chose her? Billy Boy.
But, choosing Clinton has an extra special political bonus for Obama: It gets the former President the hell out of the country for weeks at a time. We all know that Bill was a tepid supporter of Obama’s. Does that mean he’ll be an energetic critic? Clinton is going to be a huge name and considerable political force for the foreseeable future. Obama should use a little political jujitsu and put Clinton’s talent to work for him, rather than risk the possibility certainty that Clinton works against him through the press.
Plus which, Clinton would be great at it. I mean, spectacularly great. The man has the most informed and nimble mind in politics. Obama might surpass him by the end of his first term, but as of Day 1, Clinton is too big an asset to let putter around Harlem. The world is angry and disappointed with Bush’s America. They feel used and betrayed by the country they trusted and loved so much. And who has more experience with that scenario than Bill Clinton? If he can keep Hillary after Monica, he can keep the world after Guantanamo.
Of course there are plenty of big names who would also be good. John Kerry has taken out full page ads in Variety and Ebony. He was going to do sky writing, but Al Gore told him that was bad for the environment. Al Gore anyone? Oh, we’d all like to see Al get something official, but if you won a Nobel and an Oscar in the same year, would you go back to a government salary? I’d love to see John Edwards take his anti-poverty crusade global, but right now he’s more toxic than AIG stock. There are rumblings about Gov. Bill Richardson. He’d be an interesting pick. He’s held every other job in government, including U.S. Ambassador to the U.N.
A Richardson pick might mean that Obama wants to focus most of his diplomatic energy on South America, which would be a good idea. Brazil is energy independent, Venezuela is emerging as a real international power, Cuba is in a weird period with the Castro Brothers, and Peru has the oldest pyramids in the world. That’s right. Older than Egypt. Did that just blow your mind? Let’s get Bill Richardson on it.
A Kerry pick, then, might mean that Obama thinks Europe is either where the most trouble will be or from where the most help can come. Europe was stunningly quick and capable in their response to their economic crisis. Russia seems to be acting up again. More European troops could help pull Americans out of Iraq or support them in Afghanistan. The First Lady of France is crazy hot. Kerry speaks French and his wife speaks all of the other languages (although, in each of them, she still sounds like she doing an invented accent).
I am very sorry that Proposition 8—the ballot measure to amend California’s constitution to define legal marriage as a union between one man and one woman—passed. At a time when the country should rightly be reveling in the election of its first black president, those of us who care about Civil Rights and know that while some lag behind our progress forward as a nation is slowed are saddened and frustrated by the success of Proposition 8.
The irony of the breakdown on the vote is not lost on me. Seventy percent of blacks voted for the measure, and I know to many this is confusing. How could the people who built THE Civil Rights movement vote to deny fellow citizens the most basic of rights—the right of consenting adults to enter into a sacred union with one another? Without making any excuses for those who made the wrong choice, I offer that the first step to overturning the attitudes that led to this heartbreaking result is to have the right answer to this important question.
If the idea of black people voting against civil rights defies logic, it’s crucial to understand that gay rights falls in the crosshairs of two powerful forces in black culture—religion and masculinity. These forces are obviously prevalent in the dominant culture but are heightened in a community that valorizes machismo over all. Obviously this is most prevalent in rap music with its rampant homophobic lyrics spewed out by men who then go on to thank God when they win music awards. But homophobia, in subtle and explicit forms, goes largely unchallenged in large segments of the black community. Consider how comfortable Isaiah Washington felt using bigoted language towards his colleague on “Grey’s Anatomy.” He spoke the way he did because he lives in a world where this kind of language often goes unchallenged. Good, God-fearing people simply don’t get it. They’ll need your help to understand what is really at stake here.
The truth of it is that the 70% of those black people who voted for Proposition 8 probably did so because the idea of this as a civil rights issue is lost on them. Using those famous six Bible verses as a mask for their discomfort with and hatred of homosexuality, many black people probably still view homosexuality as a choice and, therefore, believe that GLBT citizens do not deserve civil right protections. You must combat this deftly and quickly, and you simply must do a better job of understanding the community you hope to persuade. Look at the people around you protesting the passage of this measure. If they all look the same, and few of them are black, you’re never going to get the change you need. Thirty percent of the black community voted against Proposition 8. Find out who those people are and utilize them to make inroads into black communities. Employing black popular figures to show how the same statements used against gay marriage were used to deny blacks basic rights is a first major step. In other words, get the biggest, blackest, coolest man you can find to talk about this issue on camera. Reminding black people that Holy Scripture has been used to promote modern slavery, silence women, and stop adults from enjoying perfectly prepared prosciutto-wrapped scallops will help.
By all means march and protest but also be strategic. Protesting may make you feel better and get important news coverage, but outreach is what makes the difference. I know it’s frustrating and wrong that you have to explain what seems so obvious. Trust me; this black woman knows how frustrating it is to explain basic truths to members of the dominant culture. But you’ve so much to gain. We all have so much to gain.
Tolerance spreads.
With a broad coalition of people from different walks of life, this loss can be turned into victory. And I really believe your time has come. You have a president-elect who while not embracing gay marriage is not, I believe, hostile to it. And the country seems more attuned to these “wedge” issues. It won’t be easy. In fact, it may be more difficult than the struggles black people face because our sexual desire cuts to the very core of who we are as individuals. And, as my friend Tracey rightly says, gay is the new “abortion” and the GOP is talking about rebuilding itself around the “sanctity of marriage” in the coming years. This battle is only going get harder, so the time is now to begin a strategic campaign.
This black person, raised as a Christian who quotes scripture at will (and sometimes at Will), is praying that this is your time.
It’s Saturday, so I think a light post about a light cabinet position is in order.
The second youngest of the cabinet positions, Veterans Affairs was established in 1989 by George Bush I. Since that fateful day, it’s been a non-stop cavalcade of hilarious and high profile secretaries known as much for their political acumen as for their effectiveness. Who’s your favorite Secretary of Veterans Affairs? I know. It’s hard to pick just one.
But I’ll do it. My pick is John McCain.
This debonair looking fellow is not only the recently defeated GOP Presidential candidate and the not-batshit-insane half of the McCain/Palin comedy team, but he’s also (I don’t know if anyone has mentioned this) a veteran. Although there is no legal requirement that the Secretary be a vet, so far all of them have been.
Beyond the political upside (which would be significant), there is an important reason to name our most famous veteran to our least famous cabinet position. That reason is Iraq. Sure, McCain doesn’t agree with Obama on any aspect of initiating, conducting, or ending the war in Iraq, but everyone wants the soldiers to return home to respect, health care, and opportunity. With the huge increase in mental health issues in returning soldiers, the collapsing of the economy, and the history of neglect (Walter Reed anyone?), I think this position is about to become very important. Or at least it should be. And a big name appointment would go a long way to showing that the new administration might be anti-war, but is never anti-solider.
The most obvious political gain for Obama comes from appointing not just any Republican, but his rival to his cabinet. The press will love it, the voters will see him reaching across the isle before he’s even sworn in, and the right will loose one of its most powerful attack lines: Democrats don’t support the troops.
That last point will become increasingly important when Obama starts cutting the defense budget. Let’s face it, raising taxes slightly on rich people will help a little, but they had to put another digit on the debt clock in New York, so there’s going to be some cutting in spending, folks. Cheney and Rumsfeld inflated the defense budget with all kinds of give aways to Haliburton and Blackwater, but there are also weapon systems that don’t work and airplanes no one wants… there’s plenty of waste over at DoD. But, the minute you start cutting defense spending, Boeing the right wing will start calling “troop hater!” President Obama needs a serious and antagonistic – almost “mavericky” – veteran he can point to and say, “Don’t worry. He’s on it. Our men and women in uniform couldn’t have a better advocate working for them.” And it needs to be true. McCain would have no compunction in calling Obama or anyone else out on not taking care of vets. Everyone wins in that situation.
Would McCain accept the gig? I think so. I can’t imagine he’ll run for reelection again in 2010, but he’s probably not ready to retire yet either. This could be a graceful exit from the Senate, but also a way to regain some of his former shine. Politicians are always worried about their legacies and McCain doesn’t want to go out as the guy who left Sarah Palin alone with a credit card and built his domestic policy around Joe the Plumber. He might hate Obama, but he likes himself more.
Oh, and if Sen. McCain leaves the Senate to join the Cabinet, Arizona Govenor Janet Napolitano gets to name an interrum Senator. She just happens to be a Democrat.
Cabinet-Palooza continues with what is perhaps the lowest hanging fruit – Secretary of Defense.
The new SecDef will have two three jobs. One is immediate – close Guantanamo. Obama should sign that executive order on Day 1 and the process should take no longer than a month. The second job – get out of Iraq – already comes with a time line. Obama promised 16 months during the campaign, but it looks like Bush may have made a deal with Malaki for an even quicker withdrawal.
The third job – figuring out what the hell to do in Afghanistan – is much more difficult because no body really knows what to do. This will require the Defense Department to work closely with the State Department and that never goes well. Obama needs a person who can follow orders (jobs 1 & 2), but who can also think of a new solution to the thousand year old question that is Afghanistan.
Everybody seems to think this will go to former Secretary of State Colin Powell. But, I don’t. Sure, I think Powell wants the job and his ringing endorsement of Obama in the final days of the campaign was welcome and maybe even a little bit helpful. But, the main reason Obama would consider Powell is the fact that he is such a high profile Republican. And that’s why Obama can’t make him Secretary of Defense. Powell is too closely associated with the Bush Administration and the Iraq war, even if his association is largely critical. Powell may have been right about buying Iraq, but Obama wants to leave Iraq.
However, Powell is far too talented and highly respected a guy not to use in some way (and the whole Republican thing is important). So, I think Obama should make Powell Director of National Intelligence. It’s an important position, but not as important as Defense Secretary. It’s a place you want a guy known for deliberative thought, skepticism, and a long-term world view. Plus, I think it would make the intelligence gathering rankand file happy to see the one person who listened to them elevated. And don’t you want the people listening to your phone sex to be happy?
No, my pick for Secretary of Defense would be Wesley Clark. I’d be happy with Chuck Hagel, too. Clark may be a terrible campaigner, but when he was the Supreme Allied Commander of NATO forces in Europe, he ran Operation Allied Force (which was essentially the Kosovo War) and had no American casualties. That’s tough to do. He’s been a strong critic of Rumsfeld and a stronger supporter of Hilary Clinton, so that’s a two-for-one.
Also, as opposed to Powell or Hagel or former DefSec Cohen, I’d like to see a Democrat at the head of the military. We are still losing votes on issues of national security and military strength because of this bizarre notion (I blame Regan) that Republicans are just better at it. The public needs practice seeing a Dem calling the shots.
There might be a slight problem in making a retired general the civilian head of the Armed Forces and that would be a knock against Powell for the job, too. But, hey. Bush made an active general the head of the CIA, so this can’t be any weirder than that.
Okay, at least make Clark Secretary of Homeland Security. Give the guy something. How many four star generals come out as Democrats? We can’t have him wasting away on the sidelines until Hilary decides to run again.
The AP has a great story on the 2,000+ strong civil rights protest in Los Angeles last night. The march ended outside a huge Mormon temple very close to where I live. I can’t believe I missed it.
Proposition 8 was the proposed amendment to the California State Constitution banning same-sex marriage. It passed… if barely. There’s plenty of blame going around from people of color (70% black, 53% Latino, whites and Asians were 49%) to gay advocates’ complacency and initial lack of funding, but the vast majority of the “YES on 8″ money came from the Mormon Church, so it seems reasonable to lay a proportional amount of blame protest at their doorstep. Also, the most common reason people gave for supporting the ban was “religion”, so thanks again to the magic underwear folks.
Let’s not forget, these are the people whose official position was that black people bore the mark of Cain and were inferior to whites… until 1979. That year, due primarily to my birth, I like to think, the Church reversed itself. In an unrelated story, that reversal saved the church’s tax exempt status.
The article is good, but it’s the slide show you don’t want to miss.
Also, the great Melissa Harris-Lacewell addresses gay rights in an Obama world with her usual insight here and there is a great (if slightly dated) panel discussion on gay marriage rights here.
As we pick up the pieces of our hearts, broken by the passage of Proposition 8 in California, let’s turn our eyes to West Lahunga Beach – a land where not only is gay marriage real, it’s hilarious. If you have Comedy Central, you probably have Logo – the gay channel way, way up the dial. If you don’t have Logo, why not call your local cable provider and ask them why?
The most important thing you need to know about this show is that I voice Rick. The second most important thing is that Tricia knows all the words to every song. For everything else, plus tons of videos, interviews, clips, and comics, go to www.happiestgaycouple.com.
Breathe it in, America. Everything has that “new President” smell!
With Obama’s astounding landslide victory secure (who among you said he’d get over 350 EVs in our little poll?), the Longest Running Series on Television, the Greatest Show on Earth, the horse race… is over. So, as we wait for “The Sarah Palin Variety Hour” mid-season replacement, let’s turn our attention to Obama’s new supporting cast: the Cabinet.
Wasting no time, Obama has already made two key appointments: Rham Emanuel as Chief of Staff, and Robert Gibbs as Press Secretary. The selection of Emanuel is particularly interesting as he will be the first Jewish person in the position and it clearly signals an aggressive legislative agenda for the Obama Administration. Emanuel is from the House, Biden is from the Senate – in his first six months in office, Obama will be like Palin in a department store… grabbing everything he’s ever wanted, but couldn’t get until now. Also, for those of you keeping West Wing score, Josh Lyman was based on him.
I don’t know much about Robert Gibbs, but I’m hoping the press takes to calling him “Gibby” and that his Southern drawl confuses Georgia into voting the right way in 2012. The public face of the first black administration is a Southern white man. Irony? Genius? Either way, it’s gonna be Aaron Sorkin’s next sitcom.
But the post everyone wants to know about is Secretary of the Treasury. On the one hand, whomever comes in next will have to solve the greatest financial crisis since we switched to coins from wampum, but on the other hand the next guy, by definition, will be a million times better than Paulson. And on the other hand (as economists like to say), how often does a new job come with a $750 billion signing bonus? A-Rod is the only example I can think of. Plus, he got to nail Madonna. If Madge is a true patriot, she’ll sleep with the new Treasury Secretary too, if only due to her misunderstanding of the phrase “stimulate the economy”. And just who might the lucky guy be…
My pick is Nobel laureate Joseph Stiglitz.
Stiglitz was the Chief Economist of the World Bank for a while and got some ink for his criticisms of globalzation and “free market fundamentalism”. In the wake of deregulated Wall Street ruining everything for everybody not named Barack Obama, those have suddenly become very popular opinions.
Currently, Stiglitz is a professor at Columbia University – which is his greatest strength. Formerly, he was Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers for President Clinton – which might be his greatest weakness.
Some of the other names discussed as possible Treasury Secs (Gov. Corzine, for one) are former Goldman Sachs CEOs, just like Henry Paulson is. So, those guys are out. Huge problems require huge solutions and another Wall Street CEO, no matter how liberal, is not nearly a big enough break from the status quo to inspire new confience either politically or financially. Stiglitz, in contrast, comes from academia (in fact, he’s the most sited economist in the world, they say), a new start for a president who isn’t afraid of thinking.
Of course, former Treasury Secretary Larry Summers is an academic too, but he doesn’t have a shot because of two factors: 1) His hilarious list of scandals while the President of Harvard, and 2) He’s already done the gig and Obama is all about fresh faces and perspectives.
Which is why I say that Stiglitz’s experience in the Clinton administration migth work against him. Yes, he wasn’t actually the Treasury Secretary, but he was close and that might end up being too close for Obama.
Frankly, the main reason I want Stiglitz is because Naomi Klein said he was cool and I think she is awesome. You can see their recent panel discussion here.
The most likely candidate at this point is Tim Geithner, the New York Federal Reserve Bank president. He’s got the support of a close Obama advisor, he’s young, and he’s being credited with sounding the alarm about an impending credit crisis over a year ago.
Everyone holding out hope for the hilarious appointment of Warren Buffet, I’m sorry. Now, back on your meds! The richest man in the world doesn’t want a day job.
Fun facts about Sitglitz here and an interview with him here.
November 11, 2008
Proposition 8: Olbermann’s Special Comment
Posted by tricia under Politics | Tags: Olbermann, Proposition 8, Special Comment |1 Comment
Turns out his heart is even bigger than his head, and he really gets it right: